14:33 Hi guys, I’m feeling a little blocked which means a ramble is in order. In the past few days (or let’s say nights) I’ve written thousands of words, meant for publishing on a blog, but which blog, I don’t know. Life is pretty hard to separate out into categories, and yet somehow, it came to be that I began to separate my online publishing life into categories. But that means that if I don’t know which category to fit something under I either start new blog (lol) or it doesn’t get published, for the simple reasons of trouble making decisions alongside reasonable life-related time constraints. (Sometimes it’s hard to believe, even for me, but I have a life outside of writing/blogging. Sort of. :))
Before I move forward from there just a few words on that. I know many of my fellow bloggers here on WP need no explanation, writing is a passion and/or a calling and/or a kind of addiction and we simply are writing all the time, even if not onto a page or by typing at a keyboard then it is in our heads while we pretend to be doing other things. But for those of you who might actually stumble upon this as readers, rather than as fellow writers who also read; first off, thank you so much for being here. I can hardly believe you’re here and that this is happening but well, your existence here in this moment proves it actually is a fact.
I was once you, reading and maybe wondering if I could finally release myself to the page and then, one day, actually hit publish. I was wondering which blog name to have and which advice to follow and which platform to choose and which author name to use and all that truly insignificant stuff that we figure must be so deeply significant at the time. Then one day we finally start writing and releasing our truth to the page and we do that for a while maybe, then suddenly we think it would be nice to share it somewhere. Then we hear a podcast or read an article saying perhaps community is key and so we somehow find ourselves a community (e.g. one other person who wants to write, something like that) and then that person has an idea of which blog to use or something and we try that platform and learn some things and then suddenly after loving it for awhile we don’t love it anymore so we try something else and finally we pretty much all end up at WordPress even if we didn’t want to follow the status quo in the beginning.
Well that’s how it was for me anyway.
The beautiful thing about WordPress.com is that it’s as easy to use as any other blogging platform (Weebly, Wix, Squarespace, Ghost, etc.) but has infinite possibilities for growth and it’s cheap. And it has this awesome built-in community that you won’t even know about until you start using the free blogging option and just start typing and labelling your posts with a few keywords and checking out blogs that have checked out your blog, then leaving a few honest comments because you’re genuinely interested in what they’re doing, and then suddenly, you’ve got a community! It’s all quite amazing.
Okay back to my main topic. My main topic is that in the past few days I finally sprang for the paid Personal WordPress.com plan for this blog, so that the ads would go away. (WordPress had bombarded my site with ads after the first month, when I was on the free plan. As previously stated, I didn’t choose those ads, nor did I benefit from them nor endorse them in any way except that they allowed WordPress to provide me with the free service of hosting this blog.)
Anyhoo, I’d received an email from reader and fellow sobriety blogger Moshe the other day, encouraging me to just go for the basic paid plan. (Thanks Moshe!) It was the impetus I needed, I suppose, since I had been actually half-heartedly trying to get the paid plan for weeks already but was blocked by the fact that the discount codes WP kept emailing me to tempt me into their paid plans didn’t work when I went to checkout. And there is no way to contact WP about it unless you have a paid plan. Ergo Catch 22.
All this to say I have finally gone for it (without the discount, though WP support tried heard enough to give me one, after I paid and then contacted them, it just doesn’t work I don’t know why, some glitch in their system) [Edit: after I posted this, the WP support team contacted me saying they’d noticed I’d successfully bought the paid Personal plan (including one year of .com domain name) at full price, and they refunded me the discount amount! Thanks WP for the awesome service!] and paid for hosting for the site as well as a domain name, so… there are now officially no ads on the site. I checked it out from the front end and it looks to be a much cleaner experience now. Celebration time! Time to crack a near-beer. Or maybe press out a carrot-apple-ginger juice.
In retrospect I have to laugh at how long it took me to start writing, then to start free blogging, then to buy the paid plan, not for this site but for my other blogs. It’s the price of a coffee per month.
Sometimes I can really get into the mindset of “but I don’t get paid for this myself! The blog is actually a liability financially, no matter how seemingly small!”
But really, it’s far from being any kind of liability. The blog is a huge help to me. Without it, without you, I would not progress as quickly. So thanks for being here, I really appreciate it. Every time you have truthfully and thoughtfully liked or commented has made me want to continue. And every time I have decided to continue, writing through whatever mental blockage, I feel like it has helped me grow in some way, and that perhaps that in the process I might actually be helping others too, just as I’d learned from others who’d done the same in the past.
The funny thing was that the hassle involved during the registration and payment for the blog, as well as the fact of it suddenly feeling very “official,” also seemed to cause a block for me in writing on this blog. So this post here is me writing through that block and seeing what comes of it and what happens next.
I still don’t know where to put that other writing. It’s actually about some fairly serious topics. When I asked the Tree where to put it, it replied very quickly, as it always does, and the answer was:
What that felt like in the moment was that it meant, “don’t worry about publishing that for now.” Maybe I still need to work through it privately first. And that the key way to help the world is in fact to help ourselves. Sometimes when we try to “save the world” we ironically fail because we can’t handle that yet, no matter on how small-seeming a scale. I am a huge one for wanting to fix every problem I see in the world around me rather than starting with my own messy little place in it, if you know what I mean.
That message from the Tree (“Help yourself”) was at once disappointing to me (I’d just done all this very painful hard-work writing, and yet, I received no immediate direction on which blog to publish it, i.e. where or how it might actually do any good) but also, it felt very relieving. To me, that’s god-energy telling me to chillax, to go with the flow.
As several fellow sobriety bloggers have been quoting recently “Know God, Know Peace. (No God, No Peace.)” And hey, Peace really is my goal. World Peace of course. But it all starts with me, and with each of us. Listening to God, or Tree, or whatever form that little inner answer voice of creative intuition and power may be, for thee, and/or we.
me near the Tree.
(sobrietytree… .com! but also still at sobrietytree.home.blog. ;))
Moshe’s blog is “Insights from the Rooms:”
“Know god, know peace” I first saw quoted here, by fellow blogger “lackadaisacalwhimsy”: